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At St. Peter’s, we believe that one of our most important ministries is to offer welcome and hospitality. In that spirit, we are glad you are here and hope if St. Peter’s is not already your spiritual home, you will consider making it so. We are also grateful to know that you are interested in having a wedding at St. Peter’s Cathedral.
A wedding is one of life’s great moments, a time for good wishes, feasting and joy. It is also an invitation for a couple to share life together in the spirit of Jesus Christ. It is based upon a public and life-long covenant between a woman and man, celebrated in the presence of God and before a priest and congregation.
Because marriage is a commitment “not to be entered into unadvisedly or lightly,” we ask that you read through this booklet carefully and then talk to us about your coming marriage.
A Step-By-Step Guide to Getting Married at St. Peter’s
- Read the material in this booklet.
- If you still wish to proceed, contact the cathedral office. An information form will be sent to you.
- Fill out the form and return to the cathedral office.
- A Cathedral clergyperson will contact you to set up an appointment. If all agree to continue forward after that meeting, the date for your wedding will be placed on St. Peter’s calendar.
- You will meet with the clergyperson for at least two more pre-marital counseling sessions.
- You will meet with the Flower Guild to choose flowers.
- You will meet with the Cathedral Organist/choirmaster to plan the music.
- You and the wedding party will rehearse the wedding. A cathedral volunteer will help coordinate both the rehearsal and the wedding.
We expect that people will be on time for the rehearsal and the wedding.
What does the Episcopal Church require?
At least one of the parties to the marriage must be a baptized Christian, and the wedding ceremony must be attested by at least two witnesses. You will meet at least three times with the officiating priest during the course of your preparation.
Do I need to be a member?
We believe that marriage is not just a ceremony in our building, it is part of the community of believers and seekers here. Therefore, we require that you have attended St. Peter's for six months prior to your wedding. Your individual spiritual journeys, and your marriage journey will be enriched by belonging to a faith community.
We will consider a wedding here if you are a member in good standing at another Episcopal church which is out-of-town. We understand that sometimes family arrangements make it easier to be married in the family’s church rather than the church one is regularly attending. In this case we usually make arrangements for the clergyperson in that church to do the pre-marital counseling. There are different fees for non-members.
What if I am divorced?
In the Episcopal Church, we observe the following procedure if you are seeking to be remarried. Clergy, in consultation with the couple, are asked to determine: that there is evidence that the prior marriage has been dissolved by a final judgment or decree of a civil court of competent jurisdiction; that continuing concern is being shown for the well-being of the former spouse, and of any children; and that the Bishop of the Diocese of Southwest Florida is notified.
Please note: If this is a third or more marriage, the Bishop must give written consent to the marriage.
What does the State of Florida require?
You must obtain a wedding license (which requires proof of identification: birth certificate, passport, driver’s license, baptismal certificate).
The downtown office is located at 545 1st Ave N, Room 101. The hours are 8:00 AM–5:00 PM, Monday-Friday. The cost is $93.50 for Florida residents, with a three-day waiting period.
If you have had the four hour counseling, the waiting period is waived and the cost reduced to $61.00. Your meetings with the clergy will fulfill the counseling requirement. Before you get your license we will provide you with proof of the counseling so you may receive a reduced rate if you are a Florida resident.
How soon can the wedding be put on the calendar?
The date will be chosen after your initial meeting with one of St. Peter’s clergy. As we deal with a busy schedule, the longer the lead time, the more choice we all have in setting the time and date. Both the wedding and the rehearsal dates and times are scheduled by the officiating priest with whom you are working.
As you plan, please consider that you may arrive up to one hour before the service and stay up to 30 minutes after the wedding. We ask that you take responsibility for being on time. Because of the vibrant life of St. Peter’s community, we often have other services and activities scheduled within a reasonable time either before or after your wedding.
Are there times when weddings cannot take place?
Weddings are generally celebrated on weekdays, or on Saturdays. Weddings are not performed in Lent, because of the penitential nature of that season. If you’re not sure of the dates of Lent in a given year, the clergy will be glad to let you know what they are. Throughout the year, priority goes to scheduled worship services. The Dean must give prior approval for any exception to this rule.
Who plans the service?
The officiating clergyperson works with the bride and groom to strike a balance that reflects both their relationship and the Episcopal tradition.
We encourage the participation of friends and family in the reading of lessons and offering of prayers. Clergy of other parishes or traditions may assist in the service, but the invitation comes from, and after consultation with, the Dean of the church.
We will be happy to provide a program for the wedding at no extra cost to you.
Our experience is that these next two areas tend to cause needless misunderstandings and conflicts. Please read these sections carefully.
What about music?
The Cathedral Organist will work with you (or assign another musician) to discuss options and to begin planning. Music at the cathedral is some of the finest in the city. Our musicians will be creative and flexible when helping you choose the best music for your wedding. Bring your ideas and preferences to them.
Because of the sacred nature of the Marriage Rite, music outside of the sacred repertoire (popular songs, show tunes, etc.) is best included in your reception. St. Peter’s Organist/choirmaster must be consulted and give consent if other musicians are to be invited.
The music of the service is ultimately at the discretion of the officiating priest.
What about photography or video?
We strive to maintain a joyful yet worshipful atmosphere in the wedding service. Good professional photographers understand this, and they will agree to minimize distractions and respect the sacred nature of the building and the liturgy.
The best way to photograph wedding participants is before or after the service. Weather permitting; the garden makes an excellent area for group pictures before the wedding. The steps to the sanctuary also lend themselves to beautiful photographs. Please remember that those who are in charge of securing the building will be ready to leave 30 minutes after the wedding service is over.
No Flash photographs may be taken once the service begins. Flash may be used for the procession provided that the equipment and photographer remain behind the congregation at the west end of the church or chapel. Please do tell friends and relatives not to use flash cameras or to stand up in the middle of the service to take a picture. It is disruptive to the service and does not respect the sacredness of the ceremony or building.
Videotaping is permitted during the service, with available light only, with the videographer adhering to the same restrictions as above.
Who does the flowers?
St. Peter’s Flower Guild creates all the arrangements for our services. When two weddings are scheduled on the same day, white flowers will be used, unless the wedding takes place on a festival day or during a festival season.
At the festival seasons of Christmas, Easter, or Pentecost, the cathedral will be decorated appropriately and no concessions can be made as to color. Easter and Christmas decorations remain in the church two weeks.
The flowers on the altar, on the side chapel and any on the columns in the church, will remain in thanksgiving for your wedding. All other flowers and greens must be removed within thirty minutes after the wedding.
The flowers that are carried by the wedding party are provided through a florist of your choice and paid for by you. If you wish to have pew bows or flowers on the pews, you may make those arrangements with the florist.
Final decisions about decorations and their placement are at the discretion of the officiating priest.
Does the Episcopal Church use a unity candle?
Only candles normally used at the services of the cathedral may be used for the Marriage Service. These are the candles on the High Altar, the Chapel Altar, and Paschal Candle used during the Easter season. For safety reasons no other candles or candelabra are permitted.
There is no ceremony of a Unity Candle in the Celebration and Blessing of Marriage in the Episcopal Church. It is suggested that this ceremony might take place at the reception.
Please Note: We do not throw flower petals, rice, confetti, bird seed or any other similar substance within or without the Cathedral building.
What are the fees?
When we meet with couples planning weddings, we often find that careful lists have been made of the costs: reception site, food, and drinks; florists and photographers; clothing and limousines. Where is the church on that list? We would ask: what value do you put on this item?
The basic set fees for weddings are:
Pledging Members........................................... $1,500.00
These fees include the following:
Organist
Energy Charge
Altar Guild
Flower Guild
Sexton
Discretionary Fund
Non-Members................................................. $3,000.00
Arrangements may be made for a vocal soloist or instrumentalist for additional fees. The parish Hall is available for receptions at additional cost.
The person responsible for these fees will be designated on the wedding preparation records. A deposit of $250.00 is due at the time of booking the wedding. The remaining fees are to be paid one month prior to the rehearsal.
We ask that you also consider giving a 10% tithe of the overall cost of your wedding as a contribution to the cathedral. St. Peter’s gives far more than it gets — to its members, to those who come here to use and enjoy our sacred space, to the poor who are helped daily through our ministries, to the city which benefits from this holy presence in its midst.
A Prayer
God of tenderness and strength,
You have brought our paths together
and led us to this day;
go with us now
as we travel through good times,
through trouble,
or through change.
Bless our home, our partings
and our meetings.
Make us worthy of each other’s best,
and tender with each other’s dreams,
trusting in your love
In Jesus Christ.
Amen.
Contact Persons at the Cathedral
Main Office Number: 822-4173
Wedding Administrator: Ext. 18
Organist/Choirmaster: Edward Barbieri Ext. 115
Flower Guild: Suzanne Earle 526-1541
Altar Guild: Fran Parsons 522-8198
Sarah Hill 525-8340
Administrator: Pam League Ext. 114
Clergy:
The Rev. Canon Millard Neal, Vicar: Ext. 112
The Rev. Canon Georgene (Gigi) Conner: Ext. 116
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